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It is 9 a.m. Sunday morning and my wife and I just issued the second of three “wake-up” calls to our 17-year-old son. Mass is scheduled for 9:30 a.m. and his attendance is not an option. I muddle through one last household chore and hope patiently that I will see him come down the stairs dressed and ready to depart.
Over the years I have made it very clear to my children that being late for Mass on Sunday is one of my “pet peeves” and have insisted that each one of them respect this minor request and be ready for Mass. My anxiety and anger is growing as the clock strikes 9:27 a.m. and my son is still not down the stairs. I yell up the stairs that we are in the car and shout out a threat for him to join us. Fortunately, our church is just a two-minute drive away. We depart at 9:29 a.m. and arrive at church one minute late.
On the short drive to church I vehemently express my disappointment to my son for what I perceived as a blatant disrespect for my wishes and a sign of his disregard for the importance of Mass attendance. Sadly, my anger and disappointment carried over into Mass.
For the first part of the Mass, I sat in silent reflection, in contrast to my normally active participation. I was just too upset to focus on the moment. Minutes seemed like hours as I became more unsettled and my anger at my son turned into anger that I was angry and at Mass no less.
The priest concluded his homily and we began to recite the Creed. Normally I would pray the Creed from memory, but this day I took out the prayer book and read along out loud. The written word served as a diversion to my current state of mind and I began to feel some relief.
Although fading, my disposition at Mass remained inappropriate and I found myself praying for a change in heart. I asked God to be with me and to bless me with the grace to change my state of mind so that I would be better prepared to receive his Body and Blood. Not receiving the Eucharist became an option. However, shortly after the Presentation of the Gifts and the commencement of the Liturgy of the Eucharist, things began to change.
I listed attentively to the Eucharistic Prayer and connected in a different way to the tangible miracle that was occurring and in which I was an active participant. I solemnly prayed the Lord’s Prayer and proceeded to exchange the “sign of peace” with my wife and son. My anger had subsided and gratitude to God took its place in my heart. As I walked down the aisle to receive Holy Communion, I prayed the Act of Contrition and thanked God for giving me the grace of proper disposition to receive.
As I received the Holy Eucharist, I found myself smiling and confidently responded to the priest, “Amen.” I walked back to my pew with a small grin and sat in silent prayer and reflection about my experience. I prayed with gratitude and joy to Almighty God for his tangible gift of the Eucharist and as the deacon placed the Blessed Sacrament back in tabernacle I felt a sense of happiness, knowing that Jesus will be with us today and every day.
This Communion was different. For the last 41 years I have received the Body and Blood of our Lord Jesus Christ on a regular basis but never had I experienced the healing power of the Eucharist like I did this day.
Receiving Communion became a joyous event. Our Catholic faith is a special gift. As humans we are weak and easily shaken. The Mass, the sacraments, prayer and community serve as tangible gifts and aid us in our faith, despite our weak human condition. As Catholics we are blessed to have such tangible gifts available to us. If we are open to receive these gifts, even on the most difficult of days, we will be blessed.
Kevin Van Norstrand is a parishioner of Regina Coeli parish in Hyde Park.
