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In his eagerly awaited apostolic exhortation “Amoris Laetitia” (“The Joy of Love”), Pope Francis offers an elegant expansion of his vision for the Church as a supportive and merciful guide to everyday Catholics as they navigate the sometimes smooth and often choppy waters of family life.
The 264-page document, issued in response to the discussions of two Synods on the family, is lengthy, as such documents go, but its plain language and focus on issues the average person can relate to make for an easy and informative read.
And while it does not change any Church doctrine or laws regarding marriage and family life, including on sensitive issues such as Communion for the divorced and remarried, it encourages a pastoral approach. “What we are speaking of is a process of accompaniment and discernment which ‘guides the faithful to an awareness of their situation before God,’” the document says.
As the pope writes in the introduction, the exhortation is especially timely in this Jubilee Year of Mercy. First, because it encourages Christians to value the gifts of marriage and family, with love strengthened by generosity, commitment, fidelity and patience. And also because it encourages all to rally around those whose family lives are troubled.
Pope Francis lays the groundwork for his main points by spelling out the experiences and challenges of families in terms of economics, cultural pressures and mores, consumerism, and the weakening of faith and religious practice in some societies.
It’s in Chapter Four, however, that his pastoral voice shines—and what is found there deserves a prominent and lasting place in Catholic discussion, homilies and marriage preparation programs.
Titled “Love in Marriage,” the chapter starts with St. Paul’s famous passage from Corinthians that begins, “Love is patient, love is kind,” to make the point that patience does not mean allowing ourselves to be mistreated or abused. Rather, it means not allowing ourselves to believe that relationships or persons must be perfect and to expect that everything will go our way.
“Unless we cultivate patience…we will end up incapable of living together,” the pope writes.
He speaks of the destructive powers of envy, jealousy and boastfulness, and the positive powers of courtesy and gentleness; of sexual passion in marriage and the enduring warmth of friendship; and of partnerships that last into old age.
The joy of love in marriage needs to be cultivated, the pope says, and dialogue is essential for experiencing and fostering that joy.
“Marital joy can be experienced even amid sorrow,” the pope wrote, with the wise observation that marriage is an inevitable mixture of enjoyment and struggles, tension and repose, and annoyances and pleasures, but always on a path to friendship that inspires couples to “care for one another.”
In the chapter titled “Accompanying, Discerning and Integrating Weakness,” the pope addresses the pastoral care of Catholics in “irregular” situations such as cohabitation and civil marriage after divorce, a topic that engendered much speculation in the months before the document’s release.
The pope writes that he is in agreement with many of the Synod Fathers who observed that “the baptized who are divorced and civilly remarried need to be more fully integrated into Christian communities in the variety of ways possible, while avoiding any occasion of scandal.”
Pope Francis also drew on the writings of St. Thomas Aquinas, St. John Paul II and the International Theological Commission in making the point that discernment “must find possible ways of responding to God and growing in the midst of limits.”
“By thinking that everything is black and white, we sometimes close off the way of grace and growth, and discourage paths of sanctification which give glory to God,” the pope wrote.
Pope Francis, from the first moments of his papacy, has been about keeping open the paths to grace and to God. This document provides another opportunity for the Church and the faithful to do just that.
